Tom Sellers – Merry Men Pop Up : This Diner not so Merry …..

When Restaurant Story opened in Tooley Street, SE1 in 2013 I was hugely excited. Not only was Chef Tom Sellers riding high on the Hot List, but also the restaurant was being set up literally 3 minutes walk from my flat. When it received a Michelin Star within 6 months of opening I was also really pleased for Tom as I had already eaten there twice, and I was spreading the news about my new favourite local boasting that I was on trend and really in the know.

A few additional visits introducing other friends to the restaurant were hugely enjoyable and everyone I took also seemed to fall in love with it. Now it is time for Story to freshen up and presumably entertain a new look.  During this period of refurbishment Tom and his team have curated an “Event” which takes the form of a Banquet style Dinner in a space in Southwark street themed on Robin Hood And his Merry Men. Tickets for the evening were selling at £75 per head and went like hot cakes such is Mr.Sellers standing in the restaurant world.

Expectations were therefore high for my band of 4 attending Friday night, to the extent we were even considering donning  green tights to fit in with the Forest theme. Thank god we saw sense and did not ! Would not have been a pretty site. First impressions were a bit of a WOW factor as the upstairs setting had long tables set out with impressive candelabras, Antlers,  sheepskin rugs scattered around and shrubbery so abundant you felt you were expected to go tree climbing

Onions and Apples were festooned around the place and the ambience was very exciting. We were a little early arriving and clearly the staff were still busying themselves in preparation, therefore I was not too perturbed in organising ourselves at this stage and approaching the bar area and organising our first drinks of the evening – a themed punch which contained Aperol,Pastis, Gin,milk of some kind and a grapefruit twist. £22 for a jug, and whilst a little sweet for my usual liking tasted quite pleasant and quite alcoholic. This had to be paid up front as apparently there was no method of toting up the drinks bill for each individual booking which I found a little strange and lacking in organisation, but OK we could let that slide.

Thereafter we sat at our table with no attention for the next 45 minutes other than the supply of a welcome drink, – Mead – another sweet offering. Again we were compelled to organise some more drinks at the bar ourselves, and sat wondering where the food was, where were the menus and indeed were disturbed by the the lack of wine menu too. All we had was a dish of butter and what looked like a pot of grain mustard to keep us company.

Suddenly a tray of bread arrived, which at least enabled us to sample the butter, which,by the way, was excellent. A waitress then finally showed some interest ( after we had stolen a wine menu from the couple next to us ) and we ordered an Italian Nebbiolo- Eugenia Bocchino 2015 which seemed quite expensive at £60, but the cheapest wine was £45 and most of the cheaper bottles had already been marked unavailable which also seemed odd. Cutting to the chase none of us liked the wine, it was extremely tannic, weak and quite unpleasant. It felt much too young. When we asked for an alternative all sorts of shenanigans ensued which resulted with me at the bar yet again being told by a young Italian female sommelier that all Nebbiolos were so tanic and we should have expected this taste, and this particular example was a best seller in Italy. She did not seem to appreciate we felt the wine was unpleasant – and for the quality, crazily overpriced – and even asked me to “cool down” when I was just reasonably explaining our dislike of the wine. I drink quite a lot of Italian wines including Nebbiolos and none had tasted this unpleasant , normally I am a fan hence I did not agree with her overview of the style.  Eventually she saw sense and agreed to take the wine back and offered us a Spanish Syrah for £45, which again was not on the menu as the featured bottle on the list was – wait for it – unavailable ! How can a wine list be so sold out and disorganised , and quite frankly so expensive with most wines around the £90 mark.

Not a good start to the evening and we had not seen or smelt a starter yet!

When food did eventually appear it was in the form of a large dish of “a fish in a sauce” which had been given to our neighbours with no explanation other than – Fish- and they were asked to take their share and pass it down to us. Now maybe some people would be happy with this style of dining but I get anxious about sharing plates even with best friends! I get concerned they will take more than their fair share of the best plates and be more generous on the not so appetising dishes. So what can you expect from strangers – and if you felt they had been greedy how do you tackle them ? You cannot start shovelling food off of their plate onto yours explaining that they need to weigh out their portion more accurately – or can you? Is this the done thing with sharing plates or has this sharing plates phenomenon in the restaurant world really gone too far now ? As one of my friends commented “ I feel like we are getting their sloppy seconds!”

Fish – useful description

The dish itself was probably smoked haddock in some kind of buttery cream sauce which was nothing special, but we did not have any idea as to its real ingredients die to the lack of menu and no word from the waiting staff other than FISH. Next up was something served up in a marrowbone, salty fish in a crumb of some sort.

Good. 20 minutes or so this style followed but with a whole array of meat dishes arriving more or less all at once with waiters giving some dishes to us directly some to our neighbours with no explanation other than “Lamb” or “ Guinea Fowl” or “Rabbit Pie”!

Were the waiters just not interested in explaining the dishes or had they not been properly briefed? I am guessing that they were all part time hired for this one event and maybe other than “Antonio” whom I recognised from STORY I am guessing none of them were part of the Sellers team. In any case I personally do not like the idea of food being plonked in front of me that I need to share with strangers, not have much idea as to what it is, and furthermore having no idea as to the number of dishes to expect making it difficult to pace your voraciousness. Lastly the dishes were nothing that special and heavily meat laden.

There was also a huge bowl of salad which was hardly touched being out of proportion to the rest of the food, and due to all dishes arriving like London Buses there was of course no room on the table, so we ended up balancing dishes on one another. Admittedly there were some hits, beef cheeks were falling apart due to the slow cook and had a nice depth of flavour and the rabbit pie was great comfort food.

After this massive intake of animals from the forest we were offered Carb rich desserts which were quite disappointing. A tiny carton of blackberries arrived to share giving us the sum total of 3 each – followed by custard and then 2 additions – brioche style bread and butter pudding and a pear tart which seemed to be on a bed of frangipani. Ice cream also arrived which we desperately tried to decipher- vanilla but with underlying taste of what – Mushroom or Beetroot ? Whatever, it was unpleasant.

My 3 lonely blackberries

Pear something…..

There it all ended with some tables seemingly in for the long haul and getting noisily drunk whilst we left somewhat underwhelmed by the whole experience. It was all a bit style over substance, with average food, expensive wine and uninterested serving staff. If this was Tom Sellers trying to make money whilst the main restaurant was being refurbished,  it was not exactly stealing from the rich and giving to the poor Robin Hood style, rather stealing from everyone to contribute to our brand new sleek and shiny new Restaurant. This could potentially damage the Story brand, and to be honest if I had never been to Story and this was my first experience of Toms food I do not think I would be racing to visit there. Friar Tuck would not have been amused !

Rating

Food – Warm Pan 2/5 (more personal care and attention required)

Service – As above

Decor – Very Hot Pan 4/5